hit me again, tubesock!

richwhitelesbian:

teapayne:

One time when I was 7 i went to this big department store and there was giant rugs hanging from the celling and you could move them to see more rugs, so i moved one and there was an employee sitting behind it eating a bag of Doritos and I screamed and started crying and the store gave us a free rug

i got fired because of you

(via shavingryansprivates)

retrded:

one time i got grounded for three months and when i got my phone back i only had three texts

(via thatsmoderatelyraven)

(Source: idontsleepbecauseof, via clairesawyer)

h0odrich:

is that pronounced like lasagna

(Source: funneestuff, via blackmormon)

actionhank:

nathoisking:

i watch the butt, i protect the butt

without this butt my life is useless

i will serve and protect this butt with my life

this is my butt. there are many like it, but this one is mine.

(Source: onanismi, via shavingryansprivates)

(Source: shinelikealltheworld, via blackmormon)

lionskeleton:

Nicholas Gottland

firefurrets:

hello

and welcome to

funky jam dance party

with some science

(via fapitalism)

Obama: I like Coke

Fox News: Obama Declares War on Pepsi

jay-z’s 99 problems: problem 54

shavingryansprivates:

no matter how hard he tries to get it right, jay z’s microwave always makes his hot pockets too hot on the outsides and too cold in the middle